FRIENDSHIP

haiz~~
a very sensetive topic
just have a lot of feeling aft
reading through xunn's blog na .

we can't blame anyone for that na
cuz i think that all this are fate ?
bt still sad ...
for e.g. for chris birthday ?
i was trying to plann something memorable for chris
bt ppl are just nt cooperative enough ...
so have to cancle the trip to escape ...

oh ya and the planning of chris birthday during skool
is nt by mie
its by shihan .
cuz really sick n tired about it le
just trying to wash my hands off everything
bt our kind shihan just wanted to do that .
n ppl can just pay back shihan the money for the cake
automatically next time ?
cuz shihan was paying it everytime n many ppl was nt paying
n she bare that sum of money on herself n i dun think its fair to her

ok should nt drag into that part
however, think that we cannot totally blame
others for the change of friendship ?
maybe the problems lies on soccer ?
cuz maybe of our differences in intrest ?

though thats my thinking ,
but heart stills hurts when friends just suddendly
dissappear ...
we used to tok for hours in mac
we cried there , laugh there
bt naw it was nth le...
everything just seems to turn into ashes ...

mami always says
the one whom put in more into friendship,
is ususlly the one who hurts more.
n i think is true ...

sometimes just think of letting this problem
go on .
i dun have anymore strength to go on lidat ...
if one day they came back,
are we suppose to accept ?
if one day ,
another third party came in ,
n they stick with them ,
this cycle goes all over agn,
will i have the courage to bare it ?

tough we are tgt during recess everyday ,
bt we are just standing down there
talking crap?
...
thats the reason why i started nt to go for
recess facing the same old problem...

something also happened from friends from other classes
have to kept their secret ,
sometimes its just too hard for mie ,
feel lyk betraying my other friends ...
sometimes really wanted to shout out everything lo
bt everytime i hold myself back agn ...
cuz i noe the consequences...
it isnt a simple thing that i can solve
feel lyk washing my hands off everything

mami was right dun care about problems
between others relationships
cuz when they were close ,
u are neglected
u have problems , they dun noe n didnt help

bt when they fight ,
they turn to find u ,
u cant say no
nor staying down there to watch...

sick and tired of everything ...

[~eZaRc~]*w0rLd